The Male Playbook – “The Tony Robbins”

When push comes to shove, men don’t always answer the bell. For reasons that aren’t crystal clear, we don’t always give 110%. So when the going gets tough and no one’s tough enough to get going, what do you do? For starters, don’t rely on clichés. While it’s true that you can answer 99.8% of all sports-related questions with clichés, they’re too narrow in focus to turn an emotional tide. Instead, motivate the troops with a full-blown, perfectly-composed, motivational speech. Motivate them with “The Tony Robbins.”

The Tony Robbins is one of the most important plays to master. It successfully captures the aggregate emotion of all the greatest motivational speeches, and it does so within an easily replicated, functional blueprint that will allow you to spur on any lackluster group. So whether it’s convincing your friend to have the heart to embrace single life, getting the guys to find the stomach to eat every last rib at all-you-can-eat rib night, or giving the team an emotional leg-up on the competition, The Tony Robbins is there to give negativity .

Every great emotional speech follows this three-prong layout. Memorize and execute:

Prong 1: Calmly state the bleak facts.

  • If you break up with her, you may not see any action for months.
  • Maybe this rib joint does have 10,000 more ribs in the back.
  • Sure they’re stronger and grow more facial hair than we do. But you know what….

Prong 2: Excitedly cite intangibles and act as if they can’t fail.

  • …I know from experience that freedom makes an excellent lover!…
  •  …Last time I checked, the heart doesn’t say, “I’m full.”…
  • …I think we got a stronger spirit, and it’s time to grow some balls!…

Prong 3: Get the crowd to commit, physically or verbally. 

  • …Now shout it like you mean it, “FREEEEEEEEEEDOOOOM!!!”
  • …I want my baby back baby back baby back, I want my baby back (keep going until they’re singing with you).
  • …[really anything in this situation. I personally opt for the Titans warmp-up].

And there you have it. In less than a minute, you can turn a room full of despair into a cauldron of positive energy. To demonstrate the flexibility of The Tony Robbins, Watch this YouTube clip:

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One response to “The Male Playbook – “The Tony Robbins”

  1. Truly inspirational dude, and yes, I will have another rib.

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