Kobe Bryant’s Diary: The Calm Before The Storm

After 16 years in the league, Kobe Bryant has decided to keep a diary to document “the year he caught Jordan”.  While Kobe refuses to remove the diary from a pedestal in his trophy room, he has allowed Writing Bareback the exclusive rights to post these excerpts.

November 27 – vs Indiana

The Pacers beat us. I scored 40. When you’re the best at your craft, you don’t always understand how your “teammates” can show up to a game not prepared to play. I was violently sick, and my simple routine more than prepared me to play. If we have another loss as embarrassing as this one, I’m gong to go off.

-Mamba out

November 28 – No Game

It’s been a rough year for white guys named Steve. At least those on the Lakers. Blake’s going to be out for two more weeks. I sent him a text as soon as I heard.

“We’ll miss you out there, nickel – Mamba”

He didn’t respond. He must know I don’t mean it. Maybe he didn’t like that “nickel” nickname. Whatever.

-Mamba out

November 29 – No Game

Dropped the Nike Kobe VIII today. You’re welcome, world.

I don’t think I keep it a secret that I take my legacy seriously, and the shoe is a big part of that. You look at Michael, and you realize that while you’ve probably surpassed him in terms of raw statistical production, you haven’t left the legacy that he has…yet. You create the kicks because even when you retire in 15 years, you know there will still be kids buying your shoes as they butcher the poetic mid-range game that you dominated like a hotel employee.

Sometimes you look at something that you write down thinking that it’ll be funny, and then you realize that it only makes you feel empty. Legacy is one fickle mother. I wonder what Vanessa’s doing right now.

-Mamba out

November 30 – vs Denver

Wailed on the nuggets. We have a .500 record and I think the team’s finally turned around. Dwight threw up 28 and 20 and actually earned his smiles. It was nice to see Jodie go off. He got 21 points after going 7-8 from three. After the game I asked him, “You actually starting to pay attention to me in practice? You look like me out there.”  Jodie laughed and said something about me scoring 14 points in 37 minutes. I know he’s joking because he’s Jodie Meeks and I’m Kobe Bryant. Silly little scamp! Great win.

-Mamba out

December 1 – No Game

Had a good workout at the gym this morning. Threw up almost 700 left elbow jumpers. I missed a few, so I forced myself to shoot 500 jumpers from the short corner.

Watched some college basketball today too. You wonder if regular people realize how bad division 1 basketball is. You think about how it would have been if you went to college. It would have been fun to average 40 a game, but you might have developed some bad habits. you’d have probably ended up like Dwyane Wade, good but not great. His nickname’s “Flash,” like a flash in the pan. I can’t believe people thought he was a better shooting guard than me in 2011.

I shouldn’t have thought about that. I’m going to the gym for some right elbow jumpers. We’ve got a game against the Magic tomorrow, and I will simply lose my shit if we don’t win. There’s few things as non-best as falling below .500.

-Mamba out

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